That's the colour of our Margaret's shower curtains - them varicose veins over there

Just because...

...It is a Sunday...
...The weather's turned horrid again, so it's been too cold to potter in the garden...
...I've had enough of lumping around with this broken foot, but know I still have weeks to go before I can remove the "big boot"...
...The world needs some cheering up...

Here's some more of the much-missed Miss Victoria Wood!

Victoria Wood - Turkish Bath

>

Victoria Wood - In the Supermarket

Victoria Wood - A Fairly Ordinary Man [starring Jim Broadbent]

Victoria Wood - Ena, Martha and Minnie ("Coronation Street")

Victoria Wood - "Kitty" [Patricia Routledge]

And finally, of course...

Victoria Wood - Ballad of Barry and Freda

Everybody loved "Barry and Freda", it seems - and everybody loved Victoria Wood.

• "I've got a degree; does that mean I have to spend my life with intellectuals? I've also got a life-saving certificate, but I don't spend my evenings diving for a rubber brick with my pyjamas on."
• "Foreplay is like beefburgers – three minutes on each side."
• "I haven't got a waist. I've just got a sort of place, a bit like an unmarked level crossing."
• "A man is designed to walk three miles in the rain to phone for help when the car breaks down, and a woman is designed to say, ‘You took your time’ when he comes back dripping wet."
• "I once went to one of those parties where everyone throws their car keys into the middle of the room. I don’t know who got my moped but I’ve been driving that Peugeot for years."
• "Sexual harassment at work... is it a problem for the self-employed?"
• "She said 'Victoria, I see you in a beige Kaftan' I said, 'well I see you in an oxygen tent' and put the 'phone down."
• "I looked up the symptoms of pregnancy ... moody, irritable, big bosoms ... I've obviously been pregnant for thirty-six years."
• "My boyfriend had a sex manual but he was dyslexic. I was lying there and he was looking for my vinegar."
• "Everyone's a national treasure these days; you can't move for them. But there should only ever be one at a time. For years, it was Dame Thora Hird. After she died, it was going to be Judi Dench, but then Joanna Lumley saved the Gurkhas so she got the gig."
• "Life’s not fair, is it? Some of us drink champagne in the fast lane, and some of us eat our sandwiches by the loose chippings on the A597."